Craft for the lil' ones

Last night I decided to sew something other than garment. Since day 1 of having my own sewing machine at home, I've been sewing nothing but my own garments. As I was flipping through the pages of my Reader's Digest sewing guide, I came upon a page on sewing projects for friends and family. My eyes were drawn to a simple shoulder bag shown and I remembered how my Nine has been begging for similar bag. I happen to keep one of Nine's jeans when he was smaller. Previously I thought of refashioning it into a skirt for my niece but after reading the guide to making the shoulder bag, I decided the jeans is perfect material for Nine's shoulder bag.

The guide said I'll need to cut four 12x14 cm rectangles but when I take this measurement against my little boy's body, I thought it'd be too big for him. After removing all seams, I then cut the jeans into A4 paper size. As I sewed two of the four rectangles, it struck me that the bag is going to be thick and chunky. Instead of using all four rectangles to make a bag, I used all four to sew two bags. One for little Nine and the other for my eldest, Azhan. It took me less than a day to sew them all as I skipped all the detailing of the bags. I know that the bag is very superb in design and very simple indeed but my Nine really loves the bag that he straight away uses it as soon as I sewed the last seam.

My Little Black and Grey Dress

In the last couple of posts, I've been boasting about my new found pastime yet not once have I uploaded snapshots of the finished projects. Well in this post I'll be featuring my first garment making project. It's not really garment making cause the material used was originally a skirt I got from my BFF who lost 20 kgs and could no longer fit it. What made me hooked on to the skirt is the material and simple embroidery sewn on it. Because of my teeny size, I couldn't straight away put it on. I'd have to alter it so I could fit the skirt. It struck me then that to alter such beautiful fabric would mean cutting off a lot of it and the ones cut off would be of no use later. I then decided that maybe the best way to go about it, is refashioning it from a skirt to a short dress.

Before the sewing commenced, I'd never thought of the obstacles and challenges that I'd come across. Quite honestly I've always thought that garment making is easy cause I used to watch my aunt sew garments effortlessly. Thus, convincing me that sewing is easy and straight forward and everybody could sew given time to try a little bit of sewing. This project proves me wrong. Sewing I think is a skill that you develop overtime and demands a lot of patience.


It took me a good four months to finally complete this simple dress. It's such a long period ain't it to sew a dress? The long period is due to me putting off the project and moving on to work with other simple material like cotton and linen. There's nobody to blame other than myself. As a beginner I shouldn't have opted for this velvety fabric for it easily frayed no matter what you do to make it stay. There was a point when I nearly gave up working on it because of the countless re-sewing, re-cutting, re-seaming that had to been done. I only resume working on this dress a month ago when I realise that this beautiful fabric deserves better treatment than abandonment.

Mood swing

Recently I've been feeling down at work I think mainly because the thrill and excitement I used to feel is starting to wear off. I've recognised my working pattern. Every time I'm assigned a new task, I'd be very excited upon the thought of gaining new skill and knowledge at work. I'm always thrilled with the challenges that this new task would bring with it. After months of doing the same thing, and I know exactly what to expect or anticipate the cause of such outcome, I no longer find the job adventurous and in need of something new to excite me again.

Another contributing factor to my current misery is last Thursday's incident. The company that I work for had just opened up a new branch in the States and its operation is very much similar to the Head Office. Thus, the staff will be using the same system that we use here and they need to be trained and familiarised with it. As one of the account assistant explained all the different funtions available on the system, our Financial Controller then further added about the office's future plan for one of my colleague's career there. As soon as I heard this, I felt very demotivated to work anymore knowing the fact that they don't see me in their future plan. It hurts even more when I know that my colleague is less competent than me. I think they're oblivious of my true potential simply because I'm not a native speaker.

With the new company structure introduced early this year, I was moved to the Finance department due to my work nature that is seen as more finance-related. When I first moved there I was optimist that this is the move that'll guarantee a better career prospect. But the longer I spend time in Finance, the more I realise I don't belong in the department. Not because I'm incompetent or incapable of doing finance work but I just can't see where myself sit within the company structure anymore. I'm neither a retail team nor am I a finance staff. In simple word, I don't feel welcome in the company anymore.

I just don't understand why wouldn't they realise the importance of my role. If it wasn't for me, who would ensure the smooth flow of the system used by our retail shop, or monitor stock inventory, or help the shop out when the system freezes? My observation tells me that many of the staff there are not very computer literate. Even a spreadsheet with simple formula used would freak them out what more of complicated ones with formulas and functions that are rarely used. I'm proud to say that as an IT-graduate I know all Office applications like the back of my hand and not afraid of using new applications.

The other day I really felt like going up to my superior and express my dissatisfaction and my need of new assignment. I guess this urge for new thrilling and adventurous task is due to the fact that I'm no longer a twenty-odd employee. I've hit the THREE-O and I need to thrive and give my all out right now so that I'll be able to achieve my personal target within the next five years. My heart is bursting with frustation and grieve over my current employment that doesn't seem promising at the minute. These frustrations sometimes lead me to regret our move here. But when my better judgment is not clouded with grieve and sadness, I'm convinced that this move would guarantee a better placement when we return home for good as the employment experience here would work to my advantage. I could only pray to the Al-Mighty that my hopeful thinking would be blessed and granted someday.

Sewing away

Whoa! Will you just look at all these dust lying around this site? The owner must have forgotten about its existence altogether or simply not bothered to do some house-keeping for this blog. Yes, I know I’m wrong. And I also realise that it’s been ages since I last posted an update on this blog and I have absolutely no solid reason to uphold my innocence. I’m guilty as charged for abandoning this very dear journal of mine. To be quite honest, I no longer feel the same urgency as I used to when I first started blogging. I think I might be among the few who followed the big herd of blogging bubble but slowly drifted away from the herd as they become entangled with other things which urgently demand more attention in their daily routine.

Ever since I took over my superior's role as the lass who ensures the smooth running of the EPOS system, my mind's been loaded with boring work stuff that I needed to bring in something new to my rather mundane boring routine. That was when I persuaded my darling Fadz to present me with something that I’ve always wanted to have; a sewing machine. For as long as I can remember, I’d always had my eyes fixed on the physique, capability and functionality of a sewing machine. I was always amazed with the beautiful dresses and clothes that could be produced by this simple somewhat ancient gadget. I remember admiring every step that my mom and my aunt took in making a dress. I'd always wish to have one of this super machine so I could make my own one-off unique dresses as they're product of my own design and imagination.


Thus, for the last few months my new love sewing machine has enticed me from this humble blog of mine. In fact, my pastime is now occupied with working on sewing projects that I've long kept at the back of my mind. Some of you may wonder if I'm thinking of becoming a tailor or seamstress; no nothing like that. Let's just say that I've found a new hobby which not only fulfills the little girl's in me has been dreaming of doing but also satisfies my crave for new clothes. I enjoy every minute spend working on my new love despite the glitches and hiccups along the completion of any project. I must say though, things are easier said than done. There were a lot of things that I used to think would be easy to handle but not as easy as it may seem.

Take my first dress project, it took me months to finish it simply because I got fed up with the difficulty that I had to put up with. As frustration (and a lot of mistakes) filled up my head, I decided to put the project aside and work on other less complicated project with the hope of brushing up my new found skill and building up my confident. Upon the completion of my second project (after months of keeping the fabric in the drawer untouched) I thought I'm ready to re-visit my first project. And true to my instinct, I'd not only brushed up my skill but also gained more confident than the first day the project commenced.

You may wonder what's the hidden agenda beneath this long rambling? Is it just my way of sharing my personal experience and point of view on my new pastime? In part, yes, this is me sharing my new hobby but partially the difficulty and complication faced I think could be applied in project management. I know the volume of work involved could never match against big project which are by far more complicated and twisted in nature. But to me one of the vital things in project management is being resourceful in all aspects; manpower's knowledge & skill, materials' constraints and advantages, feasible timeline, and contigency plan. For those of you who are familiar with project management, you'll most likely be of the opinion that I'm rambling based on my personal view and not factual proven. Yes, you're right. This writing is supported simply by my own very little experience and limited knowledge. But then again, to me this little experience I gained has taught me that even though the work may seem simple, research and study still need to be completed to prep us up for any mischief along the project completion.

Adieu, Mummy!

How would you feel when you were woken up in the middle of the night by a telephone call only to be told that the woman who gave birth to you ages ago passed away? I bet most of you will be devastated, emotionally overwhelmed by this news and the only thing that you'd want to simply drop your mundane daily routine, and quickly dash off to bid adieu to this woman whom you dearly love; whom you refer to as Mama, or Ibu, or Mummy, or Mak or Umi.

I reckon your only thought is to be by her death bed in the soonest time so that you can have one last look at that motherly face of hers before it's sealed eternally under the coffin. The only problem now is you can't afford to reach the place immediately. You live miles and miles away from her and it'd take hours to finally get there. Your journey would suddenly seem longer than it used to. The knot of guilt and regret for letting your busy work life lead the way, leaving you very little time to spare with her might start to tighten up in your gut feeling.

Every mile of the way would be filled with moments spent with her; the good and the bad ones. You'd even wish that the clock would for once stop ticking and unwind to 24 hours earlier so you could be by her side and hear her last words of advise. But it's all too little too late now. She left when you least expected it. She was strong as a horse when you last saw her which is by the way nearly 12 months ago. You could weep as much as want, but every drop of the tears your shed would never bring her soul back into the body which you once shared for nine months. All you see before your very eyes is the lovely woman who'd sacrificed half her life to give you life, lying stiff in her bed like a stone.

Ever since I started living and working abroad, these thoughts would sometime linger at the back of my mind. And every time I ring home and I hear the voice of the woman I love so dearly, these thoughts would fade away. Recently though I begun to worry again when my colleague was shaken with the sudden death of her mother. Another colleague told us how they'd only been talking about her mother just a day before and how she wish she could afford to visit her mother who lives abroad more often. How would you feel if you'd just thought of visiting her tomorrow but she's no longer there today? The only thing one can do at this moment is pray, "Dear God, please take good care of this woman whom I love so much for she's my only mother" (sob).

I'm a hopper. Let me hop!

As the system progresses with time, the frequent glitches and hick-ups which occurred during the initial stage of system usage have now resided. And I in turn found myself less and less occupied at work. Through out my employment I tend to feel restless and bored every time the work load begins to be slowly lifted off my shoulder and I’m left to wander on my own. Personally I always think that the symptoms point only to one remedy; hunting down for a new job. Ever since I completed my undergraduate studies, I’d been a faithful job-hopper whose hopping pattern could clearly be seen in my resume. Somehow or rather I just couldn’t seem to stay put at a single work place for more than 18 months, and that’s the longest period of time I could hang on to an employer. My current employment is about to hit that magic number 18 and the tingling sensation of hunting for a new work elsewhere is getting stronger every day.

I’m amazed with those people who could stay loyal to a single employer for such a long time. Take my life partner, Fadz for instance. He’s been working with his current employer since 2006 and he hasn’t thought of finding a new place despite his nearly three-year’s stay. I couldn’t understand why I can’t show my loyalty to a particular employer. Like I’ve said whenever the excitement and adventure of the position started to wear off or I’m less regularly put on the alert radar, the urge of shifting to a new place would constantly linger in my mind. But in the current economic weather, I had no choice but to be patient and put up with the current lame position. Argh!

Hello 2009

Today is the fifth day in the new calendar. When most of colleagues at work happily chat about their New Year celebration, I on the contrary just don’t bother about New Year altogether. I’ve long abandoned the needs of renewing my New Year’s resolution since I left school. I remember during my schooldays, a lot of my friends believe that the New Year epitomises a starting point to be achieve goals that were not attained in the year before. As for me, New Year is nothing but another year passing in our life and a sign that every living creature will be one year older.

There are two things that I look forward in 2009 though, firstly, our trip back to Malaysia. After nearly one year and a half living far away from my large extended family in Malaysia, I’d finally be reunited with my beloved siblings, nephew and nieces. I really miss them all very dearly. As of now, Fadz and I have yet to confirm our departure date and soon we need to work on our itinerary during our stay. If possible, we want to make sure that every single day spends at home worths a thousand different memories which we'll cherish once we return to England. Secondly, I pray hard that there would finally be a silver lining to the current gloomy economic weather.